There are two different sleep patterns in this house.
My bedtime routine is pretty much the same every night: check house and garage that all doors are closed and locked, chairs pushed in, dishes in dishwasher, recently washed clothes in dryer, toys picked up, blankets folded, pillows arranged, to-do list ready, boys' bathroom light on, boys tucked in, check emails, brush teeth, think about washing face, change clothes, get into bed and open a book.
Justin tucks in the boys, showers, brushes his teeth, changes clothes, and pretty much starts REM cycle within 10 seconds of shutting his eyes.
Once we are asleep, it is a different story. Only the sound of my children crying will awaken me; a mouse farting snaps Justin into action. If I am prematurely woken up, I am wide awake and takes me a good hour to fall back asleep; he can handle a puking dog and be back in dreamland within minutes. So he handles most nighttime emergencies. He doesn't do this out of love for his awesome wife...he does this because otherwise he has to put up with the dreaded light.
What light, you ask?
I have to read to silence the voices in my head before I can drift off to dream; my husband merely needs to be horizontal. Used to be my bedside table would supply the light necessary for me to read. This same light also made it difficult for my light sleeping husband to fall or stay asleep.
Each night after crawling into bed, he'd give me a soft kiss. I'd say "I love you," and he'd gently reply, "I love you too...but I'd love you a whole lot more if you'd turn off that f'ing light," then roll over in a huff and slam a pillow over his head. I would laugh and laugh and laugh.
While he was deployed, I told my visiting cousin and her husband about our nighttime routine. We had a good chuckle at my funny husband. When Justin returned from Iraq, my cousin sent him the best welcome home gift ever: a book light for me.
I can honestly say that book light (and the fact he handles household nighttime emergencies) has saved our marriage.
So it's 1:20 am here in Texas and, while my husband slumbers peacefully in our bed, I'm wide awake with crazy voices thundering through my head. Having surrendered to said voices, I've been killing time on the computer for an hour now, and thought to check in on your blog. Talk about providential timing! Your description of Justin 'snapping into action by a farting mouse' made me laugh out loud - but I've got to say, the fact that our men can both enter solid REM just by THINKING about laying in bed truly pisses me off. Especially on a night when my own personal REM appears to be MIA. Maybe I need a book light, too :)
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