Spouse Spotlight: Vicki Downing

Vicki has the honor of the first Spouse Spotlight!  While this was a random selection from those who comment each week, Vicki deserves this as a reward for living next to me and acting as my sounding board on many many many things. 

Plus, pretty much the same things and people that annoy me tend to annoy her.  So we've got that going for us...which is nice.

So, world...meet Vicki.  Vicki...the world and the 12 people that read this.

The floor is yours.

Hometown:  

Nevada, Iowa  (the first A is pronounced with a long A sound...not like the state)...it's in central Iowa...about 8 miles East of Ames (home of ISU); about 30 miles North of Des Moines.

What you love about your hometown:  

(Warning:  This one may get long and extraneous!)  I have great memories of growing up in Nevada.  When I was there it was a town with population of about 5000.  There were 86 people in my graduating class....86 in '86!  We had one of those downtowns that you see in the movies...the drugstore with the soda fountain, the "dime store" (five and dime, Ben Franklin, whatever you call it in your neck of the woods), a great theater with Saturday matinees.  You could walk or ride your bike anywhere...without worry.  All the moms in the neighborhood would just yell for their kids at dinnertime.  At least half of your friends were either in FFA or 4-H....and it was cool and expected to go to the County Fair every summer.  It was a great place to grow up!  When I go back now (my parents still live there), many of those things I grew up with are no longer there.  But, the people are still the same...and I don't mean the same people are there, although many are.  You can still go downtown, park your car and leave the doors unlocked and the windows down.  Neighbors help each other out.  Kids still detassle corn and walk beans for summer jobs (if you don't know what that means, you're not from a farm state!), and they still "scoop the loop".  I must say, these things are not unique to my hometown; the entire state of Iowa is made up of towns and people like I have mentioned.  Any person from Iowa will tell you they are proud to be an Iowan!  

College and degrees obtained:  

Iowa State University of Science and Technology - BS in Liberal Arts and Sciences - Major in Meteorology; minor in Math

 

What did you do in your past life (pre-military spouse):  

Been a military spouse since day one, so I guess I would have to say "student".

Years married: 

21+ (we've actually been together since 15 Oct 1982...my high school freshman year homecoming.)

Years as a military spouse: 

21+ (not including the 4 years as an ROTC date/girlfriend/groupie!)

Kids and how many: 

2 boys - Walker and Texas Ranger :) - soon to be 15 and soon to be 11.  

How they react to moving:  

Amazingly enough, my boys are very resilient when it comes to moving.  They usually hate leaving Base X and will talk all about their friends and the house there for 2-3 months after the PCS.  But, they are excited to get into the new house and meet the kids in the neighborhood at Base Y.  They are usually eager to learn about the new location and tell everyone that their dad got an assignment, spewing details about when they're leaving and where to.  Walker is at his 7th different school (and is in the 9th grade); TR is at his 4th (and is in the 5th grade).  The new school bit is always challenging...finding your way around, new rules, getting in the right classes (when you get to the high school years), and of course finding the kids you want to hang out with.  So far, I can't really complain about my boys' attitudes toward moving...knocking on wood here!

Number of moves: 

Including first PCS from college apartment = 10 (that does not include 2 moves from off-base to on-base)  Here's the rundown:

Mather AFB - Sacramento, CA (closed)

Davis-Monthan AFB - Tucson AZ

Little Rock AFB - Jacksonville, AR

Pope AFB - Fayetteville, NC

Scott AFB - Mascoutah, IL

Fort Leavenworth, KS - Leavenworth, KS

Scott AFB - Mascoutah, IL

Maxwell AFB - Montgomery, AL

Pentagon - Arlington, VA

Keesler AFB - Biloxi, MS

Dream retirement location: 

Not sure; this answer keeps changing.  Wherever the Colonel can find a good retirement job!?

Current job:  

Stay-at-home-mom; calendar-keeper; chauffeur; maid; short-order cook; KSC Thrift Shop Advisor; hot trophy wife to be seen at various official functions 

Hobbies:  

I used to:  scrapbook, do taekwondo, and read books....lately, it's been monthly Bunko and Facebook...oh, and reading Heidi's blog!  Sad, but true.

Your strengths and weaknesses:  

Weaknesses first:  

Not always speaking my mind.  (Read more about that under "regrets".)  

Hounding my kids about stupid stuff.  

Can't keep my house clean...ok, it's "clean", but not "tidy".  

I seem to be turning into a procrastinator.  I used to be really good about taking care of business right away, but I think I've started to realize that some things are more important than others and some of that business gets piled up on the counter!

Strengths:  

Realizing that some things are more important than others and letting business get piled up on the counter.  

Being experienced enough to take care of a PCS move, and all that goes with that, by myself.  

Hounding my kids about important stuff with the hope that they'll learn how to distinguish between important and stupid and make the right choices.  

Not always speaking my mind.  Sometimes it's better to just let things go!

Have you ever gone cow tipping?  

Who hasn't?!?

The moving truck just caught on fire…what three things would you want to save:  

Obviously, as with most military spouses, the super-important stuff is moving with me in the car.  But, the moving van probably has my scrapbooks/photo albums (there are just too many to bring with me), the box of Christmas decorations made by the children, and the box of the boys' school memories/awards/art/saved stuff.

Are you superstitious and if yes, how so:  

Not really.

Favorite quote:  

I have three:  

"The world is made for people who aren't cursed with self-awareness." - Annie Savoy (from Bull Durham)

"Don't let the invisible fire burn my friend" - Cal Naughton, Jr. (from Talladega Nights)

"Get on board the Tron train or get the hell out of the way!" - the Colonel (mine, not KFC's)

Biggest regret:  

Being so shy growing up.  It sounds lame, but a shy, quiet personality is not conducive to Air Force life.  I certainly haven't turned into an extrovert, and I don't go out of my way to make a statement, but I've come a long way since high school.  Most of my AF friends wouldn't have any idea of the person I was back in Iowa!

Five most important things in your life:  

Five?  Really?  My Family; my Air Force family; my brain/education.  (I could separate out family members to make it to five, but I'm gonna lump 'em and leave it.  I really feel this is not one of my best answers, but it's all I got right now.)

Where you were on 9/11: 

Living off-base in Shiloh, IL (near Scott AFB); Walker was in kindergarten, Texas Ranger was just a baby.  I was actually home watching the Today show.  I remember wanting to make sure I got a shower while TR was still asleep.  I got out of the shower and whatever news channel was on was talking about the Pentagon and I kept thinking "they need to stop talking about the Pentagon or people are going to think it got hit too!"  It took me a little while to realize what happened.  I tried to call my best friend who was living in DC at the time....little did I know he was on the Metro headed to the airport....needless to say, he didn't go anywhere and had a long walk back home!  The Colonel was TDY to Yuma, AZ...that turned into a giant waiting game to see when he would be able to get a flight back!

What makes you proud to be a military spouse:  

The people:   Active duty, Guard, Reserve, all branches, "dependents", civilians...  It really is a small percentage of the population and a fraternity of sorts.  I'm just proud to be associated with any of them.  As a military spouse, I'm happy to speak positively about the military when there are many who won't.  Military spouses support each other...and their military member...and their military friends...and any military child.  We support our bases and the communities we live in. We are amazingly strong, in every sense of the word!

What makes you sad about being a military spouse:  

Losing track of past military friends.  SERBs, RIFs, BRACs that affect friends and families.  Making my children pull up their shallow roots and replant every couple years.  Knowing that we're nearing the end of our active duty military time....

What you would like people to know about military spouses:  

(I've turned this into a "top ten" list.)

1.  We are "spouses" now...not wives.  There are too many male spouses in our midst these days to not include the guys.  Spouse clubs need to remember this and have inclusive events/prizes, not just "jewelry" bingo, candle parties, and flowery gift baskets!

2.  We don't sit around at luncheons wearing white gloves and hats.  

3.  We don't always agree with with the AF (insert your own branch here), but we will support it nonetheless.

4.  We're not all right-wing nutjobs.

5.  We do actually make cookies for new neighbors when they move in.

6.  We didn't know you had to tip the baggers at the commissary when we started this ride.  (Unless you were a military brat.)

7.  Our Christmas card lists are much longer than average.

8.  Senior Leadership spouses need as much support as anyone.  Yes, we've been around longer, but we still have the same issues...and then some.  Our husbands are dealing with so much stuff that people never see.  It takes a toll on them and the household.  People expect us to have all the answers, or expect us to convey your problems to our husbands, which seem of great importance to you, but in the grand scheme of things are not.  We have kids in the public schools too.  Don't think we don't feel your pain there.  We have learned to put on our politically correct, smiling face and present ourselves as the base representatives that we are, but we are still ordinary people with ordinary issues.  Our base house may be a bit bigger, but we have the same bug and maintenance problems!  Hug your senior leadership spouses...or least ask how they're doing occasionally.

9.  We can turn any house into a home with some rugs, curtains, and if we're really daring, a bucket of paint that's not white (for those of you in base housing!).

10.  We love what we do.  If you're a military spouse and you're not loving it, you're not trying hard enough.  You need to get out on your base and in your community and take advantage of what's there.  Go to the local sporting events, go see a movie on base, volunteer at the thrift shop, volunteer at the local animal shelter, knock on your neighbor's door if you need something, get your kids involved in sports or scouts or whatever their "thing" is, do the "mandatory fun" stuff...sometimes it IS fun.  I could really go on and on here, but I'll stop.  

I'll leave you with one last thought:  "Enjoy the ride.  It'll be over before you know it!"  Not everyone gets a chance to ride, so take advantage of the opportunity and spread the word.

Want to be immoralized on my blog?  Start commenting like Vicki and you could be next!